Someone is being love-bombed by a Knight with a secret

 

There is a new video up at my YouTube channel...

And the title says it all, no wonder you're having a terrible time making a decision about this Knight of Cups, you don't have the whole story -- and he doesn't want you to.

What a fiasco!

 

THE TAROT PARLOUR

Readings with Amythyst

5 Good Reasons for Transparency in a Relationship

Transparency in a romantic relationship is one of the most important, yet perhaps one of the least understood, factors in building a healthy relationship. The lack of importance placed on transparency in relationships likely arises from confusion over what exactly “transparency” means.

Some people interpret transparency to mean that neither partner has any private thoughts, private space, or life apart from their partner. Others interpret transparency as meaning that there is nothing about either individual's life that the other doesn’t have the knowledge and, in some cases, veto power over.

None of these are quite what relationship experts mean by the notion of transparency in romantic partnerships. Rather, healthy transparency in a relationship means that each partner feels fully comfortable to be honest and forthcoming with the other.  It means that issues are brought up directly, and that there is no obfuscation, lying, or hiding.

Transparency in relationships doesn’t mean giving up your private thoughts and personal spaces.  It means having those spaces and allowing your spouse to have access to them, without fearing that something nefarious is going on.

1. Transparency in relationships builds trust

Being transparent with your romantic partner helps to build trust. When you and your significant other know that you can be honest about anything and that you will always engage transparently, it makes it easier to trust one another.

In a transparent relationship, both partners know the other is acting in good faith.  They are less likely to be suspicious of each other both because there is a track record of honesty and because they know direct questions can be asked and answered.

2. Transparency in relationships fosters intimacy

Transparent relationships are ones in which each partner commits to open honest interaction. Such interactions mean that partners get to really know each other on deep levels.

Since no topic is off limits, and each partner knows the other is acting with honesty, it is possible to learn a great deal about your partner’s values, beliefs, experiences, and thoughts. Because transparency also means being heard without judgment, partners may feel more able to be vulnerable in sharing and broaching even difficult topics.

3. Transparency in relationships fosters a low-conflict relationship.

While no relationship is ever without conflict, transparent relationships tend to be low-conflict. This is because there is a deep level of trust between partners that issues will be discussed in a timely, open, and honest fashion, and that each partner is committed to acting with integrity in resolving the problem.

People in transparent relationships also tend to keep short accounts.  They discuss issues as they arise, rather than letting resentment build until all past grievances come rushing out at once.

4. Transparency in relationships makes each partner’s expectations clear

Most people who hide things in a relationship don’t do so because they want to hurt their partner. On the contrary, people hide or lie about things because they don’t want to hurt or disappoint their partner.  Oftentimes, however, these people are operating on a false understanding of what their partner actually expects from the relationship.

Transparency in a relationship allows for negotiation around expectations and discussions of how to navigate mismatched expectations.  When expectations are clear, people are much more likely to be able to meet them, or at least to be honest when they fall short, without hiding out of fear or repercussions.

5. Transparency in relationships foster a sense of security in the relationship

Transparency gives both partners a sense of security in the relationship. They know that there is nothing going on behind-the-scenes that would undermine the health of the relationship, which fosters a sense of well-being and safety.  Transparency can also help to foster a sense of personal security in each partner.

Because each individual knows they can be their full self without judgment, they will feel free to come to their partner for support, and can expect full honesty about any issue... the issues of insecurity that plague many relationships – that you are not enough for your partner; that you will be judged or not heard; that you will have to look outward for support, are reduced or even eliminated.

People who feel secure in their romantic relationship, and who feel that their relationship is secure, are much more likely to invest in continued growth.

There’s a lot to be said for making transparency in your relationship a priority.  Not only does it help to promote trust, reassurance, and peace, but it also enables you as a couple to explore new opportunities and experiences, because you now have elevated trust and intimacy which keeps on growing.

Transparency is a gift to a relationship and one that the wise will cherish.

Source:

http://relationshipsadvice.info/5-reasons-why-wise-couples-cherish-transparency-in-a-marriage/

Eight Ways Lying is Poisonous to a Relationship

The word ‘lie’ is one which instantly generates a vision and feeling of gross negativity; it embodies the sort of morality that most people would wish to steer well clear from.

Despite this, there are many individuals who are prepared to spin works of fiction to their friends, family, and partners – all with seemingly little difficulty.

But what is the truth about lying? What harm does it really cause? Here we examine just 8 of the many ways in which lying is poisonous to relationships of all kinds.

• 1. Lies Erode Trust

Perhaps the most obvious impact that lying has on a relationship is the erosion of trust one person has in the other. Lies and trust cannot easily coexist; eventually the former will destroy the latter.

Whether like a storm that causes a landslide, or rain that slowly eats away at rock, lies can utterly change the landscape of a relationship and make it uninhabitable for one or both parties.

Trust is so essential for a strong and successful relationship that when it is lost, the chances of total collapse are very high.

• 2. Lying Shows A Lack Of Respect

Being told the truth, no matter what it may be, confers the feeling of respect upon the recipient. It proves to them that the other person places significant value upon the relationship and is not prepared to jeopardize it by deceiving them.

While some truths will clearly put a relationship at risk, lies tend to be even more damaging. Telling someone the truth, even if you know it will hurt them, shows that you are willing to take responsibility for your actions; lying shows nothing of the sort.

As soon as this lack of respect becomes apparent, it begins to put great strain on all aspects of the relationship and, if left unchecked, it will be the undoing of it altogether.

• 3. Waiting For The Liar To Slip Up Again

Once you uncover a lie for the first time, it is hard not to live in expectation of future untruths from that person. You begin to question what they are saying, passing their words through your internal alarm systems in order to detect any hint of dishonesty.

The problem is that having to be on perpetual high alert for bullshit puts a real strain on the interactions between the two of you. Sooner or later, the mental energy required will make you want to avoid that person altogether.

On top of all this, thinking that another lie is not just likely, but inevitable is going to make you more suspicious. This is especially true in romantic relationships where one partner starts to question where the other is, who they are with, and what they are doing. This is nothing but toxic for the trust and respect we’ve already spoken about.

• 4. Lying Demonstrates Selfishness

When someone lies, they are essentially putting their own self interest before those of others. Their unwillingness to make a sacrifice for the greater long-term good of a relationship is another indicator that they do not place a high value on it.

Lies can also be an indication of more widespread selfishness and disregard for the other party, which can make them feel unloved and unwanted.

• 5. Feeling A Fool For Believing A Lie

That moment you realize you’ve been lied to is a highly unpleasant one. When your eyes are opened to the truth, you can’t help but feel foolish for ever falling for the lies.

Being made to feel this way by another person eats away at all the positive feelings you may have towards them. The hurt may open up a divide between you, or it may simply cause old cracks to resurface and widen.

Either way, your view of this person will be forever changed by the pain they have inflicted upon you.

• 6. The Liar Is Conning Themselves Too

An often overlooked consequence of lying is that the perpetrator is also being untruthful to themselves. In attempting to conceal the truth from other people, they are refusing to reveal their genuine wants and desires to the world.

In essence, they are denying their true identity and seeking to be someone that they are not. Any relationship is bound to feel the strain of this disingenuous approach to life.

• 7. Lies Make A Relationship Unbalanced

For a relationship to stand the test of time and endure the trials of everyday life, both parties must give equal commitment and energy to it. This balance creates the feeling of partnership that binds two people together and allows them to bring the best out in each other.

Lying disrupts this natural equilibrium and causes the scales to tip to one side. For the person who was lied to, it can feel as though they have put their heart and soul on the line, only for the liar to hold back theirs.

When you recognize this reluctance on their part to fully commit, it is natural to doubt their desire to make the relationship work. This is true of all kinds of relationships, but especially romantic ones.

• 8. Lies Beget Lies

It is not uncommon for one lie to lead to another and another in some vain attempt to keep the wool pulled over someone’s eyes. It might even be the case that an individual is a habitual liar who sees no real wrong in telling porkies to the people in their life.

Unfortunately, where one lie might cause repairable damage in an otherwise strong relationship, multiple lies will serve to fan the flames of the fire that will eventually engulf any sense of cohesiveness that once existed.

Where lying becomes commonplace, no relationship can survive intact.

Source:  

https://www.aconsciousrethink.com/3711/8-ways-lying-poisonous-relationships/

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