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Sometimes a person cannot be separated from their Ex, even in death...

If an Ex Contacts You Out-of-the-Blue

 

It can happen to any of us: One day, you're minding our own business and then your ex contacts you. Be it via text, Facebook, Instagram, or in person, this kind of run-in can make for a super awkward conversation, depending on how you handle it.

Whether the decision to split was a mutual one or you ended things on a sour note, the trepidation you feel when trying to figure out how to proceed is real. What should you do when your ex gets in touch out-of-the-blue? Try these things on for size:

• Think About How it Will Affect You

This can be a super painful experience, one that could offer closure, or one that starts a rekindled relationship. Think about what you want out of the communication first and how it will affect you first before you respond.

"Know that you are under no obligation to respond," Meg Josephson, LCSW, told INSIDER. "Often, old relationships carry with them old wounds and unanswered questions. If you feel that making contact could bring this up for you and threaten your hard-earned happiness, take a pass! The amazing part of being out of the relationship is that you are only responsible for doing things that work for YOU, without regard to how it feels to them."

• If You're Currently Dating Someone, You Should Consider Their Feelings

It may be a no-brainer that you immediately respond to your ex if you're single, but if you're already in a new relationship, it's important to take their feelings into account too.

"If you are currently in a relationship, consider how your partner would react to knowing that you engaged in conversation," Josephson told INSIDER. "I also find it helps to imagine how you would feel if the roles were reversed and they were in contact with a long-gone ex. Nothing like a change in perspective to keep you from responding impulsively."

• Take Your Time Responding

You may feel an urgency to respond right away, but slowing down can make sure that you're happy with your response to your ex and that you are actually ready to handle speaking with them.

"You may have a strong emotional reaction if you hear from an ex you haven't spoken to in a long time, whether it be joy, sadness, or anger," Lindsey Pratt, LMHC, a therapist in NYC who specializes in relationships, told INSIDER. "However, try to pause before replying — it will help you gather your thoughts and become less reactive in your reply. Keep in mind, too, that this may be the only re-opened communication for a while, so being sure of how you want to respond is important.

• Keep Your Response Light

When crafting your response, you may be tempted to lay it all on the table, but experts told INSIDER it's better to keep things light and breezy at first — especially if you don't know what their intentions are.

"If your relationship was basically healthy and ended due to bad timing, different paths at the time, life events, etc., then being open to this contact could be a comfortable and right move," said psychotherapist, relationship coach, and divorce mediator Toni Coleman, LCSW, CMC. "If so, keeping your response light and open-ended in order to get more information on why they are reaching out now, is the best move. This way you gather information before making any assumptions, or saying anything you may regret later."

• Don't rush into a response, friendship, or rebound

No matter how you decide to approach the contact that's been made, don't rush things. You may very well end up back with this person, or at the very least good friends with them depending on how things go. But don't rush a response or a decision about what you two "are." That won't help the situation.

"If you plan on reconnecting with your ex, set clear boundaries on what you hope to achieve from rebuilding a friendship or relationship," said Marline Francois-Madden, LCSW and CEO of Hearts Empowerment Counseling Center.  "Don't allow your ex to make you feel guilty for setting boundaries and limitations on how you will interact with them. It is okay to let them know you are not interested in rebuilding again."

• Be open and honest with them

No matter how the conversation goes, be sure that you're open and honest from the get-go. No matter how you want the talk to go, making sure everyone is on the same page can only be a good thing.
Be careful of falling into a "yo-yo relationship."

A whirlwind romance may seem like a good thing, but be sure not get swept up in the idea of an on-again-off-again relationship.

"Our culture has romanticized the on-again-off-again relationship a la Ross and Rachel," Hayden Lindsey, M.S. told INSIDER. "Yet, our best research shows that these yo-yo relationships have negative impacts on mental health and overall wellbeing. There are legitimate reasons to try again after a break up, but if you constantly find yourself in this push-pull, neither of you are getting the kind of love and cherishing you deserve."

• If you do want to get back together make sure there is a good reason why

If they've reached out and seem intent on getting back together, there are some scenarios in which you can entertain it, but it all depends on how your initial relationship went.

"If an ex reaches out, there are certain scenarios where it would be completely appropriate to entertain the idea of getting back together," Erica Gordon, founder of The Babe Report, told INSIDER. "If, for example, you broke up with them because you were going through a hard time due to personal reasons or health reasons, and you're in a much better place now, it would be more than okay to agree to meet up with your ex. Perhaps your healthier state of mind will allow for a relationship to work out this time around."

• Think about if you're leading them on

If they want to get back together with you and make that known, and you don't feel the same way, be sure that communicating back to them won't hurt them.

"There's also a chance that you don't care about your ex anymore and your ex cares about you. In that case, any type of communication can send the impression that your ex has a chance," Dr. Benjamin Ritter, founder of Live for Yourself Consulting, and The Breakup Supplement told INSIDER. "If you have an ex that still wants a relationship with you, then you need to pull back any engagement with that person, especially if you are dating someone else."

• Don't expect the magic of "closure"

One of the most common reasons for reconnecting with an ex is "closure," but few people actually get it when talking to their ex.

"You realize that you will rarely get the "closure" (the holy grail) that people speak of," Meg Josephson, LCSW, told INSIDER. "The only one who can give you closure is yourself, and time. People have a whole host of reasons for wanting to get in touch with an ex, and sometimes, they don't even fully understand why they themselves are reaching out."

Source:

www.insider.com
author:  Brittany Vincent

Some Ex-cellent Ex-advice

 

In an ideal world, breaking up with someone would be clean cut and hassle-free. People would admit and accept they're not compatible, then move on with their lives. In reality however, being human means that splitting up is often a lot more complicated. We have separations that are a little too friendly, ones that are highly contentious, and some which are downright confusing, simply because we’re actually not very sure what happened. If any of these scenarios sound familiar, here’s some advice on how to balance a past lover with your new one.

• “…he’s one of my best friends.”

As wonderful and new age as it may seem to you, no one entering into a relationship wants to hear their new partner uttering these words, or anything to this effect. It’s not that your new flame is necessarily hoping the breakup with your ex was a bitter one, it’s simply that it can be uncomfortable joining this particular club. The club being one where everyone has some intimate experience with you, whether sexual, mental, or emotional. Letting go of deep connections with an ex, if you choose to do so, can be empowering. You make way for a new person to become your best friend and you allow them to re-discover all the reasons, and more, why others have loved you.

• “…but I don’t mind if he talks to his ex.”

It’s very commendable to know you’ve chosen the right partner, whom you can trust with their own ex, but don’t be overly encouraging of their attachments to the past. You may be utterly confident about a relationship they could hypothetically have, but if they don’t want that freedom, then let it go. Don’t use it to try and balance the presence of your ex in your life. We’re not suggesting you totally cut people off here, but you must acknowledge when someone new deserves time that is uninterrupted by your previous lovers. In our opinion, dating an ex-collector is the most uninspiring type of threesome there is. No one wants to feel like they’re living in someone else’s shadow, or that they can’t get close enough because the vacant position is actually still half filled.

• “…I hate my ex, she was a complete @*@%@$^@.”

Hating your ex passionately can be just as damaging to a new relationship as still loving them. If you can’t forget the reason for your break up, the next best move is to heal from it. Walking around with a heart filled with anger, malice or regrets isn’t attractive and could potentially get in the way of new experiences with other people. Another tip is that no matter how positive the allusions may be, don’t compare the habits of your new love to those of your old. Don’t tell your new partner how much better, slimmer, more intelligent, or rational they are. Take them on the merits they present, not how they stack up against an ex.

• he’s the father of her kids, I have to put up with him.

It’s true, dating someone that has a good relationship with their co-parent is far easier than dating someone who’s constantly fighting or bickering with them. Having said this, there should still be limitations on the amount of influence ex-partners have over the two of you. As long as children are safe and cared for, the relationship you have with their parent and how you run your joint lives should have minimal input from anyone else. This includes how the household operates, how you manage your finances and your life as a family unit. If you’re the newcomer, don’t allow yourself to be dictated to, and if you’re the one with the interfering ex, put some clear boundaries in place.

Source:  I'm not posting a link to this source simply because I haven't personally checked out this company, or their website.  This wise advise on universal relationship issues was posted by a UK based international matchmaking company.  Basically, they're saying if you're going to start a new relationship, don't f*** it up with left-over garbage from your previous relationship.  You can't build something new and amazing if you're not building in a clean spot on solid ground.  (And this is my two cents on this subject)

Your Ex ~ Signs They Are Over You

With February's energy and Valentine's Day euphoria still lingering, I've been pouring over relationship posts in the land of Google.  There were some doozys about boyfriends and husbands sending their ex-wives Valentine's Day gifts, or making secret Valentine's Day phone calls, and the reaction from most relationship experts was pretty predictable for this scenario.  Basically, it was:  "What the the hell are you doing?"  Needless to say, the reactions of the new girlfriends or wives over this newly exposed revelation was pretty expected.  They were devastated.

Throughout most of these articles, one thing became really clear:  a boyfriend's ex-girlfriend, or a husband's ex-wife, is not going to go away UNTIL THEY TELL THEM TO.  And if a boyfriend or husband is shielding and protecting inappropriate or compromising communication with their ex, keeping it a secret from their present partner or wife, there can only be disaster ahead.  Nothing in this modern world of technology is going to stay secret forever, and when the secret is out, it will hit the fan.  If boyfriends and husbands are happy with their new partners, they better appreciate what they have and put all their effort and energy into protecting what they have... or they might lose it.

On to the article I chose for today.  Let's look at it from a new perspective, through the eyes of The Ex.  How do you know when you're beating a dead horse?  Read the article below for some insights.

Breaking up with someone that you care about is a really tough thing to do. Your entire world can completely change in a matter of moments and you might find yourself not knowing exactly how to move on from your ex.  If you have not really talked to him since the breakup, or if things ended messily, then you might be wondering if he still has some feelings for you. Is there any chance of the two of you resolving your issues and getting back together?

The most obvious way to find out the answer to your questions is by having a talk with him about how he feels and if he still feels anything for you at all.  In order to move on from a breakup, one of the best things you can have is closure. Without getting any closure, it can be very hard for you to move on with your life.

You might not be ready to see the signs that your ex could be over you, or maybe you just don't know how to read them. Below, you'll find signs that let you know your ex-partner has moved on, and it's time for you to move on too.

SIGNS YOUR EX IS OVER YOU

THERE IS SOMEONE ELSE

Many times, when an ex cannot get over you, they will avoid entering the dating pool for a while because nobody compares to you in their head. This happens when they are not ready to let go of you.

Maybe they will go on first dates, and their friends will try to set up your ex with someone so they can get over you. But if you are still on his mind, then he might not take any of those possibilities further because he is still thinking about you.

On the other hand, if your ex really is seeing someone else, then he is probably over you, or at the very least, he wants to give off that impression.  The act of seeing someone new can be anything from going on dates and having casual flings to settling into a serious relationship. Maybe he's even joined a dating website.

Any of those actions point to him trying to move on. If he is putting himself out there, and he has been back on the market since the two of you broke up, then he is clearly ready to move on from the relationship that the two of you had.

HE IS NOT NICE TO YOU

If he still has feelings for you, then your ex might still treat you differently than he would treat any other girl. He might go out of his way to be nice to you and he might still even flirt with you intentionally or unintentionally.

But if your ex does not try to be nice to you outside of what would be considered normal behavior, then it is highly likely he is over you. He probably now sees you as just another person, and not as the special person that used to be so close to him on an intimate level.

If your ex is over you then at best he will be civil towards you. In the worst case scenario, he will be kind of mean to you and he will not have the same patience for you that he did during your relationship.

Being around you might even irritate him. Now that you are no longer together, the rose-colored glasses have come off and you just no longer hold the same importance to your ex that you used to have. This, of course, would mean that your ex is over you.

He might not even be acting this way on purpose. Love can do crazy thing to us. It can even make us overlook every little thing that would normally bother us about a person.

Since you and your ex are not an item anymore, all of those qualities of yours probably stick out to him now, and they might even annoy him. If you were hoping that he might still have feelings for you, those chances are probably long gone.

HE ASKED YOU TO RETURN HIS THINGS

Sometimes if an ex is not completely over you, they will choose to not come back for all their things so that they have an excuse to get them from you at another time as opposed to collecting all of their belongings from you right after the breakup.

Doing so will give your ex an excuse and a chance to have to see you again. But if everything is in order and he already took all of his things back, or if he does not want his things back, then he is over you.

Basically, if he wants to forget about you or if he is over you, he will not leave your business unfinished. So if everything has been returned to their rightful owners and he has moved out of the place you shared, you can be sure that he has moved on.

HE RETURNED YOUR THINGS

People can easily get very sentimental especially about possessions when it comes to their romantic partners. This is why some of us end up holding onto things from our exes.

Even if the relationship is long over, sometimes people will hold onto a gift or a possession of their exes to just serve as a reminder of the relationship. For some people, these belongings or possessions that they have chosen to keep might even be like a souvenir or trophy to them.

If your ex gave all of your things back to you right away, then that is his way of showing you that he is serious about moving on. This is especially applicable if he gave back the things you gifted him as well.

Doing so essentially means he no longer wants anything to do with you and that he is trying to start over with a clean slate. In other words, he is over you.

HE DOES NOT CARE IF YOU ARE DATING SOMEONE

Strangely enough, we can get incredibly jealous of the people our exes date. It can be because you miss your ex or because the person they are now seeing makes you feel insecure about yourself.

One might even find themselves feeling territorial in this type of situation. If you are dating someone and your ex knows about it and does not seem to care, then he is over you.

Your ex might be completely indifferent to this new development in your life or he might even be happy for you that you have been able to move on from your previous relationship.

Either way, if you are seeing someone new and he does not seem bothered by it, it can mean that the two of you are working to keep your relationship in the past.

HE SEEMS HAPPY WITH HIS LIFE

Does your ex appear to be genuinely happy with his life? If this is the case, then it can mean that nothing is missing from his life, including you.

If he was missing you and what you used to have together, then he might express some dissatisfaction or regret that would hint at him not fully enjoying his life right now. You would see this on social media or he might even communicate to you or someone that you know that he is not happy.

But if you are seeing or hearing that he is truly happy with his life, try to be happy for him. He might be over you, but look at it as a chance for you to find your own happiness somewhere else. You do not need him in order to have a happy life.

HE IS NOT TRYING TO CONVINCE YOU THAT HE IS HAPPY

A sign that your ex actually is happy with his life is that he does not feel the need to go out of his way to tell you that he is happy.

Someone who is not really happy would go out of their way to try to convince people otherwise. They might even excessively brag about how great things are in their life.

If your ex really is happy with his life, then he will not feel the need to prove that to you or anyone else. If he seems happy and is not going out of his way to show that to people, then he is over you.

HE DID NOT CHOOSE YOU

If there was someone else and he ultimately chose that other person over you, then you have a definite sign that you were not his first pick.

There may have been more than one time where he had a chance to choose you and he never did. That action says a lot about how he feels.

Maybe you were hoping he would come to his senses and come back running to you. But if he did not pick you, then it almost definitely means that he is over you. Otherwise, he would not have risked losing you forever by not choosing you.

HE UNFRIENDED AND UNFOLLOWED YOU ON SOCIAL MEDIA

As a couple, you were probably all over each other’s social media accounts. While some exes will remain connected on social media, others will completely disconnect from each other.

If he has unfriended and unfollowed your social media accounts, then that means he does not want you in his life because he is trying to move on.

For many exes, staying connected on social media is unhealthy and can leave the door open to communication. This could be why he no longer follows your accounts.

Try to not take it personally. Many exes unfollow one another on social media so that they can move on from each other.

HE DOES NOT FLAUNT HIS HAPPINESS 

If your ex was not yet over you, then he might be trying to make you jealous by showing off his new girlfriend all over social media. He would be bragging about his new lady.

But if he is happy and is over you, then he has no reason to try and make you feel jealous. If your ex is just living his life and not flaunting his new life without you, then he is probably over you.

HE HAS STOPPED CONTACTING YOU

You were once used to him reaching out to you all the time when you were in a relationship, but you are no longer together anymore. The next thing you know, you never hear from him anymore.

While it is completely normal for people to stop talking once the relationship ends, some people still stay in touch because they choose to stay friends or sometimes because they are not yet over each other.

If your ex has ceased to contact you, then he is over you. If you have not already deleted his number, then do it. The only reason to have his number is if you have children together. You deserve to move on as well.

HE TOLD YOU HIS FEELINGS ARE GONE

If your ex told you that his feelings for you are gone, then you should choose to believe him. Why would he lie to you about such a thing?

Try to accept that it is for the best and do your best to find happiness somewhere else as you go forward with your life. You cannot control how he feels about you and there is nothing you can do about that.

What you can do is appreciate the past you had together for what it was, and cherish the good memories. But let that stay in the past. The longer you go without your ex, the closer you will be towards ridding yourself of your romantic feelings for him.

HE MOVED

Moving on does not always have to be symbolic, sometimes it can literally happen. If your ex has moved away from you, then he is most likely moving on with his life.

While it is not always necessarily true, when someone stays and lives close to you, then they might not be ready to move on. Or you might at least get that impression because that person is still around.

If your ex moves away, then chances are that you will probably never see him again. There would be no more running into each other at the grocery store or realizing that a mutual friend invited you to the same party.

Him moving away can be a healthy way to give both of you the closure that you need, and it indicates that he is ready to begin a new chapter by himself and not with you.

HE DOES NOT FLIRT WHEN YOU TALK

Even if you are no longer together with him, you might still be put into situations where you have to see him and talk to him. This can occur if you work at the same place or if you have mutual friends.

When you do talk, you are going to be friendly with each other unless things ended badly. So how do you know if he is flirting or not?

Since you have been with him, you probably know how he flirts. But there are some very obvious signs of flirting as well.

Is he complimenting your looks or finding excuses to be around you? Does he find excuses to touch you as you talk, such as putting his arm around you or resting his hand on your shoulder?

These actions could all mean that he is flirting with you. But if he keeps things very professional when he talks to you, then he is over you.


HIS NEW LADY IS NOTHING LIKE YOU

Sometimes, when we are not over our exes, we consciously or subconsciously find someone new who reminds us of that person that we are no longer with.

This can mean that the new person physically looks like the ex and has the same hair color, eye color, or overall physical appearance.

Or it can mean that this person has the same profession or interests as the ex. Ask yourself this: is his new lady just another version of me?

If the answer is yes it can mean that he is not over you, or it can mean that he just has a very specific type that he is attracted to.

However, if this woman is nothing like you, then that is a clear sign that your ex is over you. After all, he has chosen someone completely different from you.

WHEN YOU RUN INTO EACH OTHER, HE DOES NOT BRING UP THE PAST

If you run in the same circles or go to the same school or work at the same office, then you are bound to run into your ex from time to time. You might even talk to each other when this happens.

Whatever you talk about with your ex, it should never be about the past if either of you is trying to move on. And if he never brings up the past with you, then that is another sign that he is probably over you.

HE DOES NOT RUSH TO RESPOND TO YOU WHEN YOU REACH OUT TO HIM

When you and your ex were both together, then you were at the top of his priorities. He probably used to respond to your text messages and phone calls as soon as he possibly could because you were important to him.

Now that you are broken up, does your ex rush to respond to your messages and calls with the same urgency that he had before? If not, then it means that you are not a priority to him anymore.

It is perfectly normal to not respond to your ex when they reach out to you, or to not be in a rush to respond if you choose to do it. You are not a big part of each other’s lives anymore.

If your ex is not responding to you when you reach out to him, then take the hint that he is over you and the relationship that you once had. Use that as yet another reason to move on.

HE HAS TOLD YOU TO MOVE ON

There is no clearer sign that your ex is over you than this one. And that sign is that he has told you to move on.

If your ex has told you to move on, then you have probably dropped hints that you are not over him. At this point, he is desperate to move on with his life without you being there to pine after him.

You might have your reasons for wanting to hold on to hope that you will get back together, but if he wants you to move on, then he does not share your feelings.

The best thing that you can do in this situation is to accept that your ex is over you. In this case, your time is wasted hoping he will change his mind.

Do the best that you can to put your energy to better use and put your history with him where it belongs, in the past.

CONCLUSION

To sum things up, there's a number of signs that will tell you if your ex is over you. Use your judgment to figure out if he might still have feelings for you or if he has completely moved on.

And remember that if you can, you should just ask him so you can get an honest answer. The biggest sign that your ex is over you is if he tells you that he is.

Source:

This article, Signs Your Ex is Over You, is not my work, and I lost the link to the original article when my computer unexpectedly rebooted.  I'll keep an eye out for this link, and when or if I find it, I'll post it here.

Also note, this article is posted completely unedited.  I more often than not wind up editing many of these articles because the original authors, as competent as they may be on the subject matter, don't always have the best editing skills.  

Rituals: Releasing an Ex (or beating them off with a stick)

I am in the throws of writing very difficult rituals for THE BOOK today, and the most difficult one deals with a ritual to "Release an Old Friend or Lover".   While I'm entrenched with the creation of a spiritually uplifting ritual to help you regain your freedom and your sense of sanity while coming out of, or off, a relationship, I found this snippet of mundane advice to pass along, with a few brief words of personal wisdom gained through experience. 

DO NOT allow an ex, EITHER YOURS OR YOUR PARTNER'S, to intrude in your life and disrupt your space and your brand new beautiful burgeoning relationship. Kick 'em in the teeth and throw them to the side of the road, sez I. It's brutal, but necessary to sanity and survival. (In reality, this involves not so much kicking and throwing as it does blocking and deleting).  Believe it or not, there are ex's out there who don't give a rats ass if their constant intrusive demand for attention from their former spouse interferes with a new relationship. 

Here's a tip from the experts...

1. You two are not friends, so stop trying to be:

I know some argue it’s possible to stay friends with an ex. You can’t.

There is quite the difference between remaining friendly and remaining friends.  Remaining friendly with an ex is when you two run into each other and the meeting is civil.

It’s possible to end a relationship on mutual terms and not be bitter.

However, it’s impossible to move forward with your life if you willingly remind yourself of your ex.

When a relationship ends, the friendship ends as well.

The friendship was in jeopardy the moment you two decided to date.

When you still go out with, call, or even follow your ex on social media, you’re forcing yourself to have his or her memory in your emotional rotation.

In doing so, you are shutting the door on the new person who is truly right for you.

You can’t want a happy ending with a fabulous new partner while force-feeding yourself the memory of your ex.

That's not how this shit works.

To read this article in its entirety, follow the link.

SOURCE: 

https://www.elitedaily.com/dating/sever-ties-ex-get-over/1280583 ]

When Your Ex is Stalking You

Once upon a time you were a happy couple. But things changed and you broke up. And now your ex pops up at your workplace or school, parks in front of your house, sits two tables away from you at your favorite restaurant, hidden behind a newspaper, and sends you gifts, postcards, emails and text messages begging you to come back. And not just once, but every hour of every day. You are being stalked. This obsessive behavior will drive you crazy and could be dangerous, and you need to make it stop.

EXPERT TIP





SARAH SCHEWITZ, PSYD
Love & Relationship Psychologist

Cut off all contact with your ex. Love and relationship psychologist Dr. Sarah Schewitz says: "If your ex is stalking you, stop answering their calls and block them online, and if it gets dangerous, call law enforcement. It's not your responsibility to help them find closure."

Cut through your denial. Your first step to stopping a stalker is to accept that you are being stalked. Stalking is not a minor problem or a small irritant. It can be dangerous, and should not be tolerated.  Stalkers can be either men or women, and anyone can be a victim. If you are at all concerned about your ex and what he or she might do, it is not a sign of weakness to accept that. Only by doing this will you be able to stop it.

Don’t worry about overreacting. If you feel scared, worried, or angered about someone else’s behavior, you don’t need to tolerate it. If you are concerned, act quickly.

Do not confront your stalker. Recognizing her behavior will only confirm her belief that it is working, and will encourage further stalking behavior. This means ignoring gifts, calls, and any attempts she makes to contact you. Do not return them or respond in any way.

You cannot reason with a stalker. This person has already decided that she will follow you, no matter what you say. This kind of reaction will only encourage her to continue trying, or to try even harder, to stay in touch with you.

Tell other people. If you think you are being stalked, let others know. Tell your friends, family members, or other people you trust. That way, they can help keep an eye out for your stalker and call the police if they think something is wrong.

When you tell others, be careful not to demonize your stalker. You only need to let others know about them not tell them how terrible he/she is. Unless something dangerous has already happened, demonizing your stalker can only help to escalate the situation with others.

Keep a record of stalking activities. Note exactly what happened, along with when and where it took place. Keep a record of every phone call, including the ones you don’t answer, every text, every email, and every confrontation you have. If the situation escalates, and you need to take legal action, this will be important evidence to have available.

If you are concerned that your ex has access to your computer, or other means of manipulating an online list, consider writing these events down in a journal. This can be more permanent, and less susceptible to outside tampering.

Texts, emails, and phone calls are not evidence of stalking by themselves. While you can prove that the email came from your ex’s address, that doesn’t mean that she sent it. You should still hold on to these, as they can be helpful evidence when building a case for a restraining order.

Get a restraining order. A restraining order is a court order that prevents a stalker from coming into contact with you. Go to your local courthouse and fill out a petition for a restraining order.  You will need to include an affidavit that explains what your stalker has been doing. This is where your record of her actions can be helpful.

Since this is a legal document, you may want to consult a lawyer when filing the order. Of course, lawyers can be expensive, so you can also reach out to other staff members in the courthouse about your options.  A restraining order is only a legal document, and not a guarantee. It can make it easier to arrest and prosecute, but won’t actually stop an individual from stalking you. You will still need to be alert. 

Change your daily routine. Because she knows you so well, your ex will probably be able to keep track of you by visiting the same locations you do. While this is certainly annoying, you should consider modifying your favorite places and usual routes to prevent her from easily following you.

Look for things you can easily change, like places you shop and eat, or things like the gym and other places you regularly visit. Try to find different ways to get to your important locations, so your stalker can’t track you along the way.

While you probably can’t change your school and work hours, it can never hurt to ask, especially if you are concerned for your safety and peace of mind, especially if you want to avoid direct contact.  If you do need to make drastic changes to your schedule, keep paper records of the financial effect this has on you. This can be good evidence for legal proceedings, and can even be the basis for financial reimbursement if the changes are serious enough.

Change your passwords. Your ex probably knows a few of your passwords to things like social media accounts and email, as well as even more sensitive information like your bank account. Don’t give her the chance to mess with these items, or use them to track your activity.  Make sure your new password is secure. The traditional advice is to make your password a combination of upper and lower case letters, numbers, and symbols. Keep your passwords in a secure place, and only enter them on secure websites.

Clean up your social network. Online social networks like Facebook are a good resource for tracking someone. Make sure you clear out your social media accounts to prevent your ex from having ways to keep tabs on you.

Update your privacy settings so that only your friends are allowed to see your posts.

After your break-up, unfriend your ex so that she cannot track you through the network. Make sure to ignore all friend requests from her. Be very careful about adding new friends, especially people who know your ex, and would let her keep an eye on you through their activities.

Don’t be afraid to unfriend other mutual friends, especially if you are concerned that your ex will use them to track you. It may feel mean, but that is not important. Your safety is what comes first, and you cannot overreact to a stalker.  Don't make posts that clearly show your whereabouts, or anything that would let your ex find you quickly. This means avoiding obvious landmarks like your workplace, school, street signs, or anything else that would let someone who knows you figure out where you are.

Make your online materials private. This means things like your personal calendar, which would allow a stalker to follow you and know where you are planning to be. Check privacy settings on any websites you frequent to make sure nothing is accessible to anyone you wouldn’t want to see it.  Run your name through a search engine to see what is connected to you. If you find information about yourself that you would not like publicly available, get rid of it. That may mean asking your friends to remove social media posts that tag you.

Notice signs of control in your relationship. Stalking is about control. If your partner has been trying to control you, she is more likely to continue doing so after you have broken up. Some of these signs include:

Regularly belittling you, putting you down, or discouraging your dreams and personal growth.

Monopolizing your time with text or phone calls.

Telling you who you should or shouldn't be friends with, or who you should or shouldn't date after you've broken up.

Interfering in new relationships.  Even though you've broken up, they still feel entitled to have access to you when this may cause issues with your new partner.

These tips certainly aren't a guarantee that you will be stalked, but it can be a warning sign that your ex might try to maintain control over you even after you're separated or divorced.

Make your break up clear. There should be no doubt in your mind that you have ended the relationship with this person. The important thing is that there can be no confusion that you do not want to see this person anymore.

While you may be tempted to let your ex down easily, you need to be firm and clear that you want to end the relationship. A potential stalker will use any potential opening as an excuse to continue following you, so don’t give one.

If you are fearful of the other person’s reaction, make sure to break up in a public place. While this generally isn’t a nice idea, you shouldn’t be alone if you are concerned for your safety. Your security comes first.

Cut off contact. This means phone calls, emails, texts, and any other forms of communication. Aside from cutting your ex off and not giving her a way to track you, it will also help you get past the relationship.

This includes social media. Delete pictures or other items of the two of you together and block your ex. This will help prevent her from stalking you, and make it easier to move on by removing the means to stalk her in response.

Get back your keys. You and your significant other probably shared keys and other items as a way to stay close. Now that you have broken up, get your keys back. You don’t want to give her any access to you or your things.

If you aren’t going to be able to get your keys back, it is a good idea to change your locks. You shouldn’t allow such easy access into your home to someone you don’t want to see anymore.

The Source for this Article:

https://www.wikihow.com/Stop-Your-Ex-Stalking-You?fbclid=IwAR2MEnbKjXcNQqFG2mnzvtR9UbiZcHOtSDgVK3nN3YX6Dtv0QP1P66wiknc

The Loneliness of the Long Distance Breakup

Source:

thecut.com

"The thing is, just as a relationship
takes two people, so does a breakup."

The night my ex and I broke up, we slept together. It’s not what you think. For eight months, we’d been flying back and forth across the country to see each other, eight months of time-zone-complicated late-night conversations, when I would wake at 2 a.m. Eastern to hear his voice from the West Coast. After all, that’s what you do when deep in the mind-altering heat of a long-distance relationship.

The grand, sweeping power of it all — how we met by chance, how we fell into “instant-love,” and how we’d committed to trying to be together despite the 3,000 miles between our homes — was itself a kind of foreplay to me, a romantic with an overdeveloped imagination. Some of the best parts of a long-distance relationship live in the fantasies built up in the spaces in between visits. Your belief that despite the distance, a cosmic connection exists, transcending all the mundane constraints of daily life, makes you a little bit superhuman, super-beloved. It feels glorious. And, who knows, it might even work out!

But at some point, even that LDR high couldn’t keep up with the actual absence I had begun to feel, almost as though this boyfriend who had never fully been there geographically in the first place was slipping away. That’s when I did the most dangerous thing you can do in a long-distance relationship: I wanted more. I had been telling him I was unhappy over the phone for weeks, the discontent growing stronger within me, and his resentment growing in accord with my own.

He drove across the country to stay with me, lugging his suitcase into my apartment and taking up residence, no fantasy at all, just reality. I hadn’t intended to incite a breakup conversation, exactly, but suddenly, there it was, right in front of us. At the end of it, he asked, “Do you want me to leave your apartment?”

It made sense, why would he stay? But the idea of him leaving jolted me. If he were here, he should be with me. That was how it had been since we’d met.

“No, um, I mean, you’ve got work to do, and where else would you go?” I said. “And we haven’t eaten dinner. You have to eat dinner.”

That night we got into the same bed and lie there without touching, facing away from each other, the way one might share a hotel mattress with a platonic classmate on a school trip, fully aware of the space between us and making sure not to cross over, because that’s not who we were to each other, now. When he fell asleep, I let tears slide down my face and muffled my crying with my pillow.

The next morning, he drove away, back across the country, where it was no longer my business to try to find him again. For several weeks, I felt euphoric and free, as if he were a problem I’d managed to shake and was all the better for it. Then, oddly, I sunk into a kind of delayed despair. Even though he was gone, no longer in the same Zip Code or even time zone as I was, and certainly no longer calling me too late at night (how I wished he would!), I saw him everywhere: on Twitter, on Gmail. His little green Gchat light taunted me. Facebook and Instagram left a thousand hints and a thousand imaginings. Was he already over me, and dating someone else? Probably. I couldn’t ask, I didn’t want to know, but I wanted to know so badly!

E-lurking and even stalking is par for the course with just about any modern ex, near or far, but the geographical divide between us had meant we’d largely relied on these measures to connect, and while I’d ostensibly given him up, I couldn’t stop looking at my phone, willing a text to come in, or one of those beautifully written emails I’d once gotten from him.

Instead, mostly there was simply the absence of him, which felt more raw and enormous each day. Occasionally we would talk, because we were supposed to still “be friends,” because what had brought us together was always mutual respect and admiration and caring, and also because I’d begun to secretly hope that if I didn’t disappear entirely from his life, he’d change his mind. He came to town six months after we broke up, and we wandered around together in Brooklyn, where he helped me pick out a new pair of glasses. It felt like closure, though in retrospect, I was still hanging on, even then.

For a full year, I saw him, or ghosts of him, versions that grew both more frequent and also further from the truth as my memories stretched out and became wobbly with time. I cried when I got home from drinks with other men, thinking about how they’d failed to measure up, and no one ever would. I’d look out my window across the street, where Brooklyn hipster types and their dogs lined up for coffee, and I’d see a tall bearded man in plaid wearing glasses, and a shock would go through me. It couldn’t be him, could it? (It couldn’t.) Since I never ran into him, say, in a bodega, looking hung-over and like no one I should have dated in the first place (see: a range of past exes), I could never quite get ahead of our breakup. He was always doing better, always a success story, always okay, because he wasn’t around to prove otherwise, and he certainly wasn’t calling to tell me anything. As I struggled to come to terms with what had happened, I beat myself up doubly: for giving up on us, and for being so damn bad at this breakup.

Finally, several weeks to the year after that last night we slept in a bed together came a series of drunken Gchats (my fault). That our last conversation, rendered incoherent with however many wines I’d sipped, would occur via the same medium by which we’d conducted much of our courtship was further insult to injury, and yet, it had a necessary effect: I stopped reaching out to him altogether. And, funnily enough, I started to feel better.

A friend who has also endured a long-distance breakup told me she found her ending easier than the demise of a local relationship. “The time we spent together didn’t feel like it belonged to either of our lives, because our relationship didn’t exist anywhere but in between,” she said. “Since our lives were never really integrated, it felt like our time together was like vacation.” But for me, it was the opposite. When we were together, I had seen my relationship as existing everywhere: In my apartment, and in his, which I could still see via social media if I dared to look. In the airplanes that took us back and forth across the country, in the phone lines, in my internet connection, in the food we ate together and places we went, in the conversations we shared and people we met, and most of all in the future I’d imagined for us. Maybe my idea of us had grown so expansive, the reality of us couldn’t keep up. And when we ended, instead of our breakup eradicating his presence — out of sight, out of mind — for me, it caused him to grow into something more looming and idealized than he had ever been in reality. This ghost ex-boyfriend, created of the wisps of a withered long-distance relationship, a fantasy phantasmagoria, was a force to be contended with. Had he been real, he might have been quite the catch. But, of course, he was only in my own mind.

While I was convening with ghosts, he was moving on. It took me a long time, but eventually, I followed suit. The thing is, just as a relationship takes two people, so does a breakup. At some point, I began to realize that, and I stopped imagining.

When You Fall In Love With the Guy Who's Still In Love With His Ex

• When you fall for a guy who’s still in love with his ex, you probably won’t realize it at first. He’s hooking up with you.  He’s obviously not that broken up about his last relationship.

• When you fall for a guy who’s still in love with his ex, you may begin to notice that he has good days and bad days. Sometimes it seems like he can’t keep his hands off you, and other days he’s standoffish, impatient, and sharp. Or he treats you with disinterest, or as an irritation.

• When you fall for a guy who’s still in love with his ex, you’ll eventually pick up on the unusual tone in his voice when he speaks of her.  Maybe he brings her up too frequently in conversations and a wistful look comes over his face, or he'll become emotional talking about an incident that made her sad or unhappy.  You’ll awkwardly stand and listen.  You don’t want to rudely interrupt him, but you’d rather discuss just about anything else in the world than this.  Or maybe it’s the opposite – each time you ask a casual question about her, he wears a pained expression and changes the topic as soon as possible. It’s evident that he would rather discuss just about anything else in the world than this.

• When you fall for a guy who’s still in love with his ex, you may spot her name pop up ever so often on his phone, or he may attempt to hide her in his contacts under another name.  You try not to dwell on it.  It’s perfectly normal, in certain situations, for exes to remain friends and nothing inconvenient comes from it.  But something doesn't feel right.  Your intuition kicks in, and you realize the amount of contact going on is not normal, and the secrecy surrounding this contact is definitely not normal.  He's treating this connection with his ex like a man who's having an affair.

This unusual contact with his ex will make you feel like a third wheel.  You won't understand what your role in his life is, and you may even feel like you're interloping on their "husband/wife" relationship.   Finally, you may muster up the courage to utter the dreaded question,  “What are we?”  Because you're honestly not sure.

It took you immense effort to conjure enough confidence to ask this question, and his long stumbling detailed response to this question prompts you to ask another... “Are you still in love with your ex?”

Your boldness takes both of you by surprise. He stares at you, mouth agape, contemplating how he’s going to answer this question, but his hesitation already answered the question for you.  Your next question, "What on earth do you two talk about?" and his long astonished embarrassed silent pause confirms your suspicions.

• Deep down you know that if you fell for a man who wasn’t still in love with his ex, he would have immediately answered these questions with no hesitation.  Better yet, there would have been no signs that compelled you to even ask him about his relationship and feelings for his ex.  The issue would have been non-existent.  Most people, men and women alike, are eager to put their past relationships behind them.  If you suspect someone is not over their ex, you’re probably right.

• If you fall for a guy who’s still in love with his ex, you need to accept it and move on.  It may be hard, really hard, but what’s even harder is living with the knowledge that another woman still occupies his heart. You could put all of your energy into trying to win him over, to show him how much you love him, and how devoted to him and your relationship you are... you could cook all his favorite foods; you could perpetually be ready to have sex at any moment; and you could wait on him hand and foot, being at his every beck and call. But not only will this be futile, you don’t deserve the burden of trying to make room in his heart for you, and you alone.

You deserve a man whose thoughts revolve around you, and only you, as his partner and someone who shares his life.  You deserve someone who chooses you as much as you have chosen them.  You deserve a man who is going to put 100% of himself into the success of your relationship. 

Source:

https://thoughtcatalog.com/anonymous/2016/07/when-you-fall-for-the-guy-who-still-loves-his-ex/

8 Signs Your New Partner is Not Over Their Ex

The idea that your partner might not be over their ex isn't exactly one that most people would want to think about.

Though you might not want to admit that you see potential signs that your partner isn't over their ex, many of them aren't exactly subtle, Mark Stevens, author of "Evidence of Love," told INSIDER. And once you see these signs clearly, it might be difficult for you to continue to move forward pretending that you don't see them.

We rounded up some big signs that the one you love may still be hung up on their ex.

1. You can tell that their mind is somewhere else.

• They may mentally be with their ex.

If your partner doesn't seem to be fully present with you when the two of you are spending time together, that's one potential sign that they might be thinking about someone else.

Though being preoccupied doesn't necessarily mean that they're not over their ex, it could. Stevens said that you can feel the distance between the two of you, even though you're physically together. He added that it's because they're "always with that ex" mentally, even though they're likely no longer always with their ex physically.

2. They're always ready to defend their partner when they come up in conversation.

• If they go out of their way to do this for no reason, it may have a deeper meaning.

"If someone constantly feels the need to defend their ex, specifically at times when their ex isn't the center of conversation, it could mean that they aren't quite over them," Weena Cullins, LCMFT, a licensed clinical marriage and family therapist and relationship expert, told INSIDER.

3. They try to bring them up in conversation.

• Their ex probably shouldn't be in conversations on a daily basis.

Not only does your partner want to defend their ex, but they also look for reasons to talk about them. "It's like he wants to talk about her, but he can't talk about her to you without a non-threatening reason," Stevens said. "So he tells anecdotes. And the anecdotes look like they're designed to tell you things about great restaurants or great vacations or whatever, but they're really just so he can talk about her because he wants to talk about her because we all want to talk about people that we love."

It might not always be obviously about that person — their ex — but that person is always a part of the story.

4. They won't commit to you.

• They may still be hooked on the past.

If your partner seems to be dragging their feet when it comes to committing to you and your relationship, that too could be a sign that their past isn't fully in the past.

"This can be a major red flag due, in large part, to the nature of where it's coming from," Tara Vossenkemper, MA, LPC, ACS, a therapist and the founder and clinical director of The Counseling Hub, told INSIDER. "For example, if your partner has a problem with commitment, but it's unrelated to past baggage in relationships, then it's not about an ex. However, if your partner says that their lack of commitment is from being "burned" in the past, then you can guess it has to do with an ex. And, obviously, they're not over it. A person who has been able to heal from a breakup is able to reconnect with another partner. If somebody is unwilling or unable to do so, then it means that they don't want to heal, don't know how to, or that they think there's still a chance with the ex."

It's hard to sort out the exact reasoning for why your partner might be having a difficult time with commitment, and it might not actually have anything to do with their ex, but as Vossenkemper said, if they allude to the fact that they're hesitant because of how a past relationship played out, that could mean that the relationship is something they might still be trying to get over.

5. They try to establish traditions with you that they started with their ex.

• Forcing old traditions onto new relationships could be a red flag.

When two people have been in a relationship for a while, they're bound to settle into routines and form new traditions. Traditions, routines, and celebrations help people connect with one another. But forcing old traditions on new relationships can be a sign that your partner isn't fully over their ex, even if you thought they were.

"If your partner keeps trying to get you to do very specific things and then saying things like, "That's what me and [ex] used to do," then you need to take pause," Vossenkemper said. "Building new memories with your partner is different than recreating memories you used to have with an ex. One is meaningful and organic. The other is sad and full of baggage."

6. They won't enforce (or create) boundaries with their ex.

• They might be avoiding setting boundaries for a reason.

It's important to set boundaries with exes, but if your partner isn't quite over their ex, it might be difficult (or impossible) for them to do so.

"If someone refuses to create boundaries between them and their ex, especially at the request of a new love interest, it could definitely indicate that they aren't quite over their ex," Cullins said. "Despite breaking up, some partners who haven't moved on will not create new boundaries for fear that it will reduce any residual contact they still have with their ex."

7. Their pictures are still all over social media.

• If there's still a ton of couple shots, you might want to be leary.

Your partner doesn't need to delete all evidence that they've ever dated anyone else, but if the photos that they choose to leave on social media are romantic shots, that could be a red flag. Cullins said that while group shots and things of that nature might be OK, lovey-dovey couple shots could mean that they haven't been able to move on.

8. They go out of their way to contact them.

• They contact them all the time.

"If someone makes excuses to reach out or bump into their ex long after the relationship has ended it's likely that they are not over them," Cullins said. "They may be looking for closure or to reconnect, but in either case they are still drawn to their ex."

Feeling the need to be in touch with them no matter what means that something isn't fully settled there. It might not mean that they're still in love with the ex, but it still might mean that they haven't gotten over them.

If you notice that your partner seems to be exhibiting signs that they are not over their ex, the first thing you should do is check in with yourself about the relationship, Vossenkemper said. "Ask yourself whether you see something long-term with this person or if it's meaningless and fun," she added. "Ask yourself how much you want to invest in the relationship."

If you're hoping that the relationship will move forward, you need to talk to your partner about what's going on. "Don't be afraid to ask thoughtful questions about their behavior because it might help them come to terms with the reality that they haven't moved on," Cullins said. "If a person insists that they are over their ex but their actions continue to create discomfort, think critically about how emotionally safe the relationship is. If it will be difficult to live with the current boundaries (or lack thereof) it might be a good option to hold off on a serious commitment until you're certain your partner's heart is fully available."

Stevens said that he thinks people have to go through "the puddle of pain." It's not something you want to wade into, but you'll be better for it.

SOURCE:

https://www.insider.com/signs-someone-not-over-ex-2018-8#8-they-go-out-of-their-way-to-contact-them-8

Dealing With a Jealous Ex-Spouse

Jealousy is most often caused by low self-esteem, insecurity, and fear of abandonment. The fact that jealousy is caused by personal fears explains why divorced people so often feel jealous of their ex-spouse, even though the jealousy makes no logical sense. After all, most divorced couples have no emotional connections with each other, so why feel jealous? In spite of being an irrational feeling, feeling jealous of an ex-spouse happens all the time, especially when he or she begins dating, gets engaged, introduces his or her new love to the children, or gets married and starts a new family.

• Causes of Jealousy

Feeling jealous is associated with high levels of oxytocin, the so-called “love hormone.” Men most often feel jealous when their ex-spouse begins having sex with another man, while women feel jealous when their ex-spouse becomes emotionally involved with another woman. Individuals who are insecure, anxious, or fear abandonment experience more jealousy than people who are personally secure.

• Jealousy and Control

Jealousy is difficult to handle between divorced people because it makes little sense. After all, what is there to be jealous about? The divorced spouses are no longer married, and most of them have no emotional relationship that can be threatened, so why should the fact that an ex-spouse has started dating or become engaged make any difference? The reason an ex-spouse feels jealous is related to a need to control others to make themselves feel safe. Jealous divorced persons are trying to manage their own fears by exerting control over an ex-spouse. Jealousy isn’t about love, it’s about the jealous person’s own anxieties and insecurities.

• Maintaining Boundaries

When an ex-spouse discovers you are dating or getting married, he or she is likely to bombard you with communications to push your buttons and make life difficult. This behavior is unreasonable because any rights he or she had over your life went away when you divorced. Your ex-spouse is no longer your partner, lover, or friend, and he or she has no right to interfere with your life. If your ex-spouse is being disruptive, avoid him or her. Establish clear boundaries after the divorce to keep your new life separate from your ex-spouse. Get a protective order if necessary and ignore his or her attempts at controlling you.

• Interfering with Relationships

If your ex-spouse tries to interfere with your new relationship by saying “I don’t like him/her”, ignore the complaint and go on about your business. Jealousy is your ex spouse’s problem. Don’t pay any attention to what your ex-spouse says. He or she has no right to interfere with your life. Don’t engage or argue with your ex-spouse about your new relationship, because that will encourage him or her to continue trying to control you. As a single adult, you are the only one in a position to determine who you date or marry.

• Dealing with Jealousy

The best strategy is to disengage, set clear boundaries, and get on with your new life. Let your ex-spouse deal with his or her feelings of jealousy on their own. What should you do if you are feeling jealous of your ex-spouse? Avoid situations that are likely to arouse your feelings of jealousy, such as monitoring what your ex-spouse is doing, or talking about him or her with your children. Avoid interacting with him or her as much as possible so you can focus on developing a new life for yourself.

Feeling jealous of an ex-spouse is difficult to control because it’s caused by irrational anxieties and fear of loss. If you are divorced, even if it wasn’t your idea, that relationship is over, and you need to get on with your own life. Focusing on a lost relationship is neither healthy nor productive. If you are feeling jealous of your ex-spouse, it’s probably because you are feeling insecure, dependent, or fear being abandoned again. Your best strategy is to see a counselor. Once you feel better about yourself, the jealousy will disappear.

Source:

Harry Munsinger practices collaborative and estate law in San Antonio. He has over twenty years experience resolving disputes involving divorce, probate, wills, and trusts. Harry was an adjunct law professor at the University of Texas and St. Mary’s University. He has published several textbooks and over forty psychological and legal articles. Harry has been a forensic psychology expert, a licensed psychologist and a litigator.

Relationship Issues ~ Compilation of Links to Blog Posts

The following blog post titles are links that will take you to relationship posts.  If you recognize an issue in this list, follow the link to find out how you can cope with it, or resolve the problem.  You'll also find posts that celebrate and encourage happy partnerships.

Is Your Partner Emotionally Unstable ~ here's a checklist

Narcissists ~ why they deliberately try to make their partners jealous

Emotional Cheating ~ 10 signs that's what you're doing

Are You Spiritually Connected to Your Partner ~ Here's 7 signs you are

If An Ex Contacts You Out-of-the-Blue

Twin Flames ~ Do we all have one?... and other questions

Searching For an Ex On Social Media ~ 13 things you need to know

Mid-Life Crisis ~ the signs and symptoms

When Does Flirting Become Cheating ~ 9 red flags

Cheating and Sexual Addiction ~ 6 Types of Cheaters

Forever Engagements ~ It's a Thing!

Emotional Deprivation Disorder ~ and the inability to maintain healthy relationships

Facebook and Couples ~ browsing separately together

Relationships ~ The Serial Over-lapper

How to Get Revenge on a Cheating Husband

The Myth of the Golden Age of Marriage

8 Signs Someone is Jealous of Your Relationship

15 Signs His Friends Don't Like You

Cougars versus Dirty Old Men

8 Reasons Why Sex is Better After 50

5 Drama-Free Ways to Announce Your Engagement

Chronic Cheaters

Some Ex-cellent Ex-advice

Twin Flames ~ Understanding the Connection

23 (Very Down-to-Earth) Signs You've Met Your Soul Mate

Abandonment Issues ~ How it affects relationships

Dating After Divorce ~ Your Checklist of Do's & Don'ts

Your Ex ~ Signs They Are Over You

10 Signs Revealing His Ex is On His Mind

10 Ways to Tell He's Lying

Second Time Around ~ Should You Remarry Your Ex?

When Your Ex is Stalking You

Seven Ways to Introduce Your Boyfriend After 50

The Loneliness of the Long Distance Breakup

Do's and Don'ts ~ What You Shouldn't be Doing With Anyone But Your Partner

Text Message Cheating

When You Fall In Love With the Guy Whose Still In Love With His Ex

8 Signs Your New Partner is Not Over Their Ex

Dealing With a Jealous Ex-Spouse

Signs Your Ex Wants You Back

My Ex-Wife and My New Wife Don't Get Along

Relationships ~ 4 Situations That May Be Considered Cheating

When He's Stuck in a Codependent Relationship with His Ex

The Naked Truth ~ Why Sex After 50 Is Still Hot

Advice for Those With Divorce Regret

Is Talking to Your Ex-Spouse Normal?

Celebrating Soul Mates ~ Signs You've Met Your Soul Mate

Signs He's Still in Love With His Ex

When Someone Responds to Your Boundaries With Anger

Seven Secrets to a Healthy Relationship Over 50

Divorce ~ Cut the Marital Cord Already!

Wedding Showers ~ Creating Sacred Space

Why Falling in Love Over 50 Kicks Ass

What If Your Spouse is Having an Emotional Affair?

Eight Signs You've Met Your Soul Mate

Eight Ways Lying is Poisonous to a Relationship

How To Break It Off With an Ex Who Won't Let Go...